Jennifer E.

  Hello fellow Thrivers!!  My name is Jennifer Ewing.  I am 56 years old.  Married, Mother of two adult sons and Nana to Little Miss, age 2!!  My family was my reason to approach my diagnosis and treatment with faith and strength.  I had put off going to my general physician for months.  I really thought it was just hemorrhoids.  When the bleeding became constant and heavier than just when I wiped (underwear stained daily), I finally went in.  I told my general physician and was prepared to just hear it's just hemorrhoids and send me home with cream suggestions or suppositories.  He wanted me to have a sigmoidoscopy just to check what was happening based on my reported bleeding and blood work showing some anemia.  The day of my procedure, my husband and I really thought that they would find some things needing clipped out or something.  After the procedure,everyone was being dismissed but me.  Okay.  I guess I have to wait for the Doctor for an explanation of what they found.  We were brought into a consultation room where he told us.  Cancer was not a thought at all!  He was 99% sure it was anal cancer due to HPV and was going to plan treatment going forward until the biopsy proved him wrong.  What? We both looked at each other for a moment and then looked at the Doctor.  At the same time we both wanted to know the course of action and how quick we could begin.  We were a little shell shocked on the way home however when we started to talk, we both had found our game faces!  Determined to attack this with everything we had within ourselves.  The next day I had an appointment to visit with an Oncologist within a few days.  The biopsy came back fairly quickly.  Stage II HPV Anal cancer based on the size of the tumor and one lymph node involved. No metastasis.

Appointments at our Cancer Center with a Chemo Oncologist and Radiation doctor started filling up my calendar fast!  Telling family and friends, my children, was tough, especially telling my elderly Dad.  I even announced it on Social Media.  No embarrassment. Rally the prayers and tell everyone to get their butts checked!!  They all surprised me with the same game of support and attack.  I'd find out later they had moments of breakdowns but rallied just the same and never wavered in front of me.  My mother and I were estranged at the time but she came to the table with daily calls and support.  Within two weeks I started my first week of daily radiation (5 days a week for 7 weeks) and my first week of continuous chemo via a picc line.  Chemo would be continuous the first week and the 5th week through my picc line.  During this whirlwind of activity, I found an Anal Cancer social page support group.  WOW!  They had lots of information.  Some horror stories but also lots of suggestions and information.  I found that the Doctors at the Cancer Center didn't really tell you much unless you specifically asked.  This treatment can be brutal for some so I'm guessing too much detail would scare you right out the front door.  I however needed information and warnings.  That is who I am and how I operate.  I prepped with lots of purchases in preparation.  Some I used and others I didn't but was so glad I had options if I needed them.  The most important arrangement was the week my husband had to go out of town for work and my best friend traveled from Kansas to Florida to help me.  I was blessed that I had a friend that could smother my nether region with Aquaphor and laugh hysterically as I felt like a turtle on her back with all my business out for her!!

At the beginning I had very long, blonde hair.  I decided early on that I would cut it short as I didn't want the hassle of long hair as I went through treatment.  Week three my hair started coming out very quickly.  My hairdresser that cut it short said that if it started falling out she'd shave it all off for free if I wanted.  So bald is what I did!  I chose that because I learned that it could be empowering to make that decision yourself.  Take control and not be upset every time your hand was full of hair or the pillow looked like the dog had shed all over it.  One less thing to deal with as my bum was about all I could handle.

Not to be grotesque but the hot, radiated lava that I dealt with was gross and horrible.  Constant cleaning, drying and applying creams as a buffer for my skin.  Sitting in sitz baths for relief.  I did develop a fissure from my anus up my crack.  That was so painful!!  I made every radiation appointment no matter what and I dragged around that portable chemo with gusto!  Bald head, loose clothing, Aquaphor and a newly installed bidet became my comfort.  I finished all weeks of radiation and chemo but unfortunately developed Neutropenia about 4 days after treatment ended.  I collapsed one morning and was very confused.  My white cell blood count was at 400 and I had an infection somewhere.  A 5 day hospital stay set me straight.

Currently I am about 8 months out from concluding treatment.  I've had two clear scans.  Completing scans and blood work every three months for about two years to monitor.  My tumor is gone.  The lymph node affected has shrunk.  There is currently no evidence of disease.  NED!!  You hope to hear that, believe me!!

My hair is growing back.  Black and white, tight poodle curls!!  Really different from straight blond hair!!  I have no idea what to do with it so I just go with it every day.  My strength and what I call my battery life increases every day.  I'm pretty much back to my activities but I'm diligent in giving my body rest as I know it's been through hell.

We are all Thrivers no matter the outcome.  We are Gladiators in this journey!  It's super tough and from what I've read the ramifications can be continuous for years but bring it on!  I've literally kicked cancer's ass and I'm not backing down.